


The Last Promise

by Azar



Series: The Last Promise [1]
Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-09-29
Updated: 2011-09-29
Packaged: 2017-10-24 03:35:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,150
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/258499
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Azar/pseuds/Azar
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A dying Sha're extracts one last promise from her husband--to find and bring home her brother.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this because somehow I got to wondering how Stargate SG-1 would've played out differently if Sha're had died in "Children of the Gods" instead of "Forever in a Day." I had originally intended to write alternate versions of several episodes over the course of the series, but like with many other AUs I've started, got distracted and never got further than a couple of stories. This is the AU version of "Children of the Gods." *sheepish grin*

It was probably the oddest thought he'd ever had, and Daniel Jackson had been known for some odd ones during his tenure in "respectable" archaeology. Like the notion that the Egyptian pyramids had been built 5000 years earlier than previously assumed, the one that had gotten him laughed out of his last lecture as an academic and started him on the most unexpected leg of his life's journey. Nevertheless, once he was alert enough to really reflect on the thought he'd awoken with, he was pretty certain it surpassed them all for sheer strangeness: his bed was too comfortable.

Of course, as coherent thought began to return to him, the reason for that sank in, and his spirit sank with it.

He was no longer on Abydos. The bed underneath him belonged to the US Air Force, in an empty barracks room on base at Cheyenne Mountain, Colorado. Earth. It had a real mattress, not the pile of fur and rough-woven rugs that he'd slowly grown accustomed to over the past year. The soft pressure of his wife's body against his wasn't missing because Sha're had risen with the dawn to start their day, but because he was truly alone.

Jack O'Neill had offered Daniel the use of his guestroom, but he'd been too numb to accept. Somehow, going outside felt too permanent--if he looked up and saw the stars of his childhood littering the sky, what felt like a vague, unreal nightmare would suddenly become hideously, painfully real.

Sha're was gone.

The thought almost choked him. It was a struggle to draw another breath; he was drowning in the memories that washed over him like high tide. Skaara, taken by the serpent guards who came through the Stargate, and Sha're...

* * *

"Shhh, don't try to talk..."

"Skaara...they took Skaara...I tried to stop them, but..."

His hands were trembling as much as the shoulders they cradled, and his voice even more so. "I know--Colonel O'Neill and his men will go after him--"

"No! You must find him, my Dani'el...promise me you will find him!"

"Sha're, if you think I'm going to leave you--"

Her hand tightened on his arm and she let out a faint cry of pain as one of the soldiers Jack had brought with him tried to determine the severity of the staff wound in her side. "You must go," Sha're insisted. "You have to bring Skaara home...my father must not lose both his children..."

"He's not going to lose you--"

"Promise me, Dani'el!"

He closed his eyes, still fighting to cling to his denial of the truth that was becoming more painfully obvious with each weakening breath she drew. "All right...I promise..."

* * *

He had lost her. They had both lost her. Oh, God...Sha're...

And now here he was, back on Earth, with the only door back to the world that had been his home now shut for a year, until the day he'd promised to return with Skaara, or never at all. Promised to return because it had been the last thing she asked of him...to find her brother and bring him home.

Why, Sha're? Why did you make me give you my word that I would find him? If only she'd saved her strength instead, maybe she could have survived--

Do you blame me then, my husband? Her troubled voice echoed in his mind as clearly as if she were lying beside him, instead of beneath the hot, desert soil of Abydos, worlds away.

No! No, I don't blame you, Sha're...God, I could never blame you...I blame myself...

He did, too--he blamed himself for her death, and with justification no one could dispute. He should never have unburied the Gate after they'd discovered the cartouche chamber. He should never have left Sha're behind while he took the Colonel and Captain-Doctor Carter to see it. God, he should have evacuated the pyramid as soon as Jack told him that someone like Ra had come through the Gate on Earth...

Too many should haves and shouldn't haves; between that and the mattress, it was no wonder sleep couldn't hold him.

There was no clock in the room, but he didn't really need one to know he hadn't slept long. There were no clocks on Abydos either, after the battery in his watch finally gave out. He'd gradually learned to tell time by pure instinct, and right now his body was telling him that he'd only been asleep for an hour or two at most.

Unfortunately, his mind was telling him that chances of adding to that number were slim to none. Only pure exhaustion had driven him out of the waking world in the first place; now that he'd been reminded of the waking nightmare that was just waiting to haunt his dreams, even trying to go back to sleep seemed futile.

Daniel sighed and clambered out of the bed. If he couldn't sleep, he needed to find something to occupy his mind until morning. Something other than the memory of his wife dying in his arms.

He got a few suspicious looks from various MPs and other personnel as he wandered aimlessly up and down corridors. Pity most of the staff had been hired after he stayed behind on Abydos--otherwise they would've gotten used to his late night ramblings back when he'd been struggling to decipher the cover stone. The difference being, this time he was questing for far more than coffee; he was searching for peace of mind.

Something he strongly suspected he wouldn't find within the walls of this mountain, if he ever found it again at all.

He rounded another corner and was surprised to see a thin band of light seeping out from under a door further down the hall. Feeling foolishly insect-like, he gravitated slowly towards it. If inertia kept resting objects at rest then curiosity must surely be its antithesis, for it never failed to stir him to movement.

The door was shut, but only lightly, for the light pressure of his hand raised to knock had inadvertently swung it open to reveal the slightly disheveled form of Captain Carter hunched over a desk spread with black-and-white photographs. Stills from her videotape of the cartouche chamber, most likely.

Wide, startled blue eyes met his above a mouth open in surprise. "Dr. Jackson."

"Ah, Captain Carter, I...I'm sorry," he stammered. "I...the door was...ah...and the light..."

"No, it's okay," she interrupted his broken attempt at an explanation, fumbling to hide the pictures on the desk for a moment before giving up and offering him an awkward smile. "Come on in. Coffee?"

"Please."

What the hell--as he'd already concluded, it wasn't like he was going to be getting any more sleep tonight anyway. "So what's your excuse?" he quipped dryly.

Carter blinked at him. "For what?"

"Still being awake."

She flushed. "I guess I just...got caught up in what I was doing and lost track of time."

Daniel couldn't help but laugh at that. "Sounds familiar. When I was trying to figure out the cover stone, I did some of my best thinking at three in the morning."

Captain Carter glanced at the clock and smiled. "Well, it's 2:54 now, so pull up a stool."

He moved immediately to obey the teasing command, startled by how much that simple phrase had lifted his spirits: Pull up a stool. Help me. I need you.

Okay, so he was probably overanalyzing--she didn't need him; if she had, she would've come pounding on his door hours ago, not waited for insomnia to bring him to hers. Still...it was nice to feel useful. Since Sha're had died in his arms only hours ago, he'd felt nothing but a helpless, raging grief. Helpless to save her, powerless to keep his promise to her. This--taking the abstract promise of that now-hated chamber and striving to make something real of it--was something he could do.

"What exactly are you working on?"

She straightened up a little on her stool. "I'm writing a program for the dialing computer, to compensate for stellar drift on the expanding universe model."

"Oh." So much for feeling useful. "Maybe I should just--"

"No, stay. Please." Carter's voice stopped him before he could climb off the stool and she smiled sheepishly. "This is just as much your project as it is mine--embarrassing as it is to admit, I probably never would've thought of this without you."

Daniel grimaced, flashing back involuntarily to that moment of connection they'd shared in the cartouche chamber, heedless of the danger faced by those they'd left behind in the pyramid. It had been so long since he'd been able to converse with someone on an intellectual level that her "I knew I'd like you" had pleased him far, far more than it should have. Maybe that was why he'd lost Sha're--maybe in some cruel way, Fate was punishing him for forming such an instant rapport with a woman other than his wife.

Reading his expression, the blonde Captain smiled ruefully and ducked her head in embarrassment. "I am sincerely sorry, Dr. Jackson...about Sha're." Her voice was quiet, her sympathy real and laced with regret.

He shook his head. "It wasn't your fault."

"If we hadn't re-established contact with Abydos--"

"--we wouldn't have had any warning at all," he insisted. "And if I'd just left the Gate buried like I was supposed to, you wouldn't have been able to re-establish contact in the first place...and Abydos would be safe, but Earth would still be in danger," he admitted finally.

Now there was a question for the Universe--if he could go back and save his wife, knowing it might be at the expense of the planet of his birth...could he still do it? Daniel shivered, not really wanting to know the answer.

"We'll find him," she promised. "The bastard who did this...as soon as Feretti's awake enough to give us those symbols--"

"If he saw them. I know." He flashed her a genuinely grateful smile. "Now I just have to figure out how to convince General Hammond to let me on that team."

"Well, I don't know if my recommendation counts for anything," she offered with a small smile. "But I think you proved on the first Abydos mission what a valuable asset you could be to an off-world team."

Daniel blushed. "Proved it by virtue of what, exactly? Lying about being certain I could get us home? Inadvertently convincing Kasuf that we were gods and getting myself a wife in the process? Bringing down the wrath of Ra on the people for taking in his enemies, or lulling them into a false sense of safety after Ra's death?" His tone was wry and self-deprecating.

"You didn't really lie about getting the team home, because you did get them home. And you also found a way to eliminate the threat from Ra without having to kill the people of Abydos," the Captain argued in counterpoint. "I'd say that definitely made you an asset to the team--if that bomb had been detonated on the surface, we would've killed all those people for nothing. This 'Ra-lookalike' still would've come here, and we wouldn't have any way to fight him because we'd still be looking in the wrong place."

There was a long pause while they both considered the other's words. Then...

"Getting yourself a wife in the process?"

The light pink tinge in his cheeks not only returned, but also deepened several shades. "Ah...Sha're was sort of a...a gift, I guess you'd say. From the elders of Abydos."

All of a sudden, all the camaraderie faded from her eyes, replaced by indignation. "A gift? And you accepted??"

"No!" he protested, quickly amending it with, "Not at first. I...um...only pretended to."

"Doctor Jackson--!"

"You have to understand, in their culture, for a leader such as Kasuf to offer his daughter as a gift to a visiting dignitary is a sign of great respect and honor. To refuse would have been an insult of the first magnitude--"

Captain Carter was not appeased. "So? She's still a person, not a...a puppy to be given away as soon as it's old enough to be separated from its mother!"

"Captain-Doctor, you saw Sha're and me together--do you honestly believe that I considered her no more than property?" he stated quietly.

That took a little of the fight out of her one-woman picket line. She sighed. "No."

"It was for her sake that I pretended in the first place, to protect her from being punished for failing to please me. But what you don't realize...what I forgot too...is that Sha're didn't understand my apparent rejection any more than her father would have. She thought I didn't want her. That I didn't think she was the bravest, most beautiful--"

He stopped, his throat too tight to continue.

"I'm sorry," Carter almost whispered. "I didn't know."

Daniel smiled weakly. "My parents were Egyptologists. After they died...I guess you could say Ancient Egypt itself became sort of my surrogate family, at least in my mind. It was my one surviving connection to them. Going to Abydos...meeting Sha're...it was like that imaginary family I'd created for myself, made up of people who had been dead and buried for thousands of years, suddenly just...came to life."

That brought a faint smile to the Captain's lips as well.

"Many cultures in that part of the world today still practice arranged marriages. And to many people who grow up in that environment, it doesn't matter that they didn't fall in love with their spouse before they married them--often they fall in love afterwards. Love is a choice, Captain-Doctor, not just a feeling. It's what you choose to make of that feeling. That's what Sha're taught me..."

His voice trailed off as he stared at the door without seeing it. He was seeing through it: through the door and the maze of hallways, through the Stargate to the other side of the universe...

"Doctor Jackson...that's...poetic." The words could've been mocking. Probably would've been if it were Jack O'Neill saying them rather than Samantha Carter. Instead, they were spoken in a tone of quiet awe.

He flushed again, though not as darkly this time, and tried to hide it behind his cup of coffee. "Ah...yes. Well, I guess waxing poetic is one more thing I do well at three in the morning."


	2. Chapter 2

His head hurt. That was the first thing he noticed as his mind crawled back out of oblivion. Like a sinus headache, only much, much worse. Someone could've come along and put an axe right between the two lobes of his brain and it couldn't have felt much worse.

Daniel almost snorted, only prevented by the thought of how much that would probably hurt--clearly his thoughts were still jumbled if he was coming up with *that* kind of analogy.

He sat up slowly, noting that they were in what appeared to be a medieval dungeon, only a lot larger and with actual windows high in the walls, which meant they had to be above ground.

"Whoa. Easy, you've been unconscious for hours," Carter's voice intruded into his consciousness as her steadying hand came to rest on his shoulder.

Hours? Somehow that didn't surprise him. The last thing he remembered...come to think of it, what *was* the last thing he remembered?

* * *

__

"I made a promise to my wife, General...I need to go."

__

_Daniel hated the pleading tone in his own voice, but he was admittedly desperate, and General Hammond didn't seem to be bending on this. Even though he was already going against his own better judgment just by obeying the President's orders to see what lay on the other side of the Stargate._

_"Sir, if I may..." Captain Carter's voice drew all eyes to her. "I think Dr. Jackson's expertise in ancient cultures and languages are far too valuable *not* to utilize off-world. That expertise brought Colonel's team home the first time--without him, they would have died on Abydos. And if we're supposed to make peaceful contact with the people on these other worlds...how can we do that if no one speaks their language? I don't think it would be impractical to assign someone familiar with the languages and cultures we might encounter to every SG team, Sir."_

_Daniel shot her a grateful look, which she answered with a smile. The General, seeming surprised by the show of solidarity, threw a questioning glance at Jack. The Colonel just shrugged._

_"I'll take that under consideration," Hammond conceded. "Major Kawalsky, you will head SG-2..."_

_The rest of the briefing seemed to pass in a blur. At least, the minute or two of discussion that passed before someone slipped in to notify Samuels that Ferretti was awake. Jack was out of his seat without even being dismissed, and the rest of the group wasn't far behind as soon as Hammond released them._

_Daniel intercepted Captain Carter en route. "Captain, I...wanted to thank you for sticking up for me in there. I know you said you would, but I still...I appreciate it."_

_She smiled again, faintly. "You're welcome. I don't know if it'll help, but...I guess I owed it to you to at least try."_

_"Ah...owed me for what?"_

_Carter didn't respond, only ducked her head and looking away with a pensive frown in her eyes, causing him to blink in confusion._

_"Captain Carter?"_

_"Sam," she corrected, forcing a smile. "Call me Sam."_

_For a minute, Daniel fought to accede to her request, but the thought that had tormented him last night only came back to haunt--what if Sha're's death was a punishment for the instant bond, however innocent, that he'd formed with this woman?_

_"I...I can't," he admitted. "Not...not yet. I'm sorry."_

_She looked confused and a little wounded by his refusal, but nevertheless accepted it. "Oh...okay."_

* * *

But no...there was more after that. Ferretti had given them the coordinates; that he was sure of. And they'd traveled...he, Jack, Captain Carter, and Kawalsky's team, SG-2, had traveled to the planet...

* * *

__

"So, tell me about Abydos. What was it like, living there?"

__

_Captain Carter's words got Jack's attention too. He rounded on them both with a challenging smile while still managing to keep an eye on the surrounding vegetation. "Yes, Daniel, what *did* happen after we left you there?"_

_Daniel ducked his head. Unfortunately, he couldn't dodge the question by just comparing Abydos' desert climate to this lush world, because they'd both seen that for themselves. No, what they wanted to know--or at least what Jack wanted to know--was what had happened in the interim to make the people of Abydos so reluctant to part with him, even when he was going to hopefully find and rescue one of their own._

_"They...um...treated me like their savior. It was...pretty embarrassing."_

_"Well, technically you did save them, Dr. Jackson--"_

_"Don't encourage his ego, Captain," Jack interrupted with an amused glance at the red-faced archaeologist, to whom his next facetious words were directed. "It's amazing you turned out so normal."_

_Daniel smiled weakly. "Well, if it wasn't for Sha're I probably--" He stopped, took a deep breath and looked away for a long moment. "She was the complete opposite of everyone else. She practically fell on the floor laughing every time I tried to do some chore they all took for granted, like grinding yuffetta flour. I mean, have you ever tried--"_

_Jack interrupted him then with an upraised hand and a wary look in his eyes. "Hold up."_

_Following the line of the Colonel's eyes, the other two saw a group of hooded figures that looked like monks, walking towards them along a wide dirt road. Immediately, before the group could spot them, Jack moved towards the bushes, gesturing for Carter and Daniel to do the same._

_Typical Jack O'Neill, Daniel thought with a silent sigh. Shoot first, ask questions later. He liked the man--he just had a problem with that mentality. Particularly since he was certain that if they went in with guns blazing, they would blow any chance they had of getting the locals to help them locate Skaara and the others who had been taken._

_And the sooner he found Skaara, the sooner he could get far, far away from the Stargate and everything related to it, and try to forget that he'd had a perfect life for one perfect year before losing it all again._

_"Oh, for crying out loud!" he heard O'Neill hiss from somewhere behind him as the Colonel noticed what he was doing._

_Raising his hands in a gesture of peace, he stepped towards the monks. "Hi."_

_"The man has not changed," Jack grumbled, presumably to Captain Carter. Yup, he was going to hear about this later, but he didn't care._

_The monks were still staring at Daniel when he heard Carter and O'Neill come up on either side of him. He could almost feel the waves of irritation rolling off the military man, but surprisingly not from the blonde woman._

_"We just came through the Stargate..." Expressions of blank confusion greeted that pronouncement, so he tried again. "Uh, the, uh...chaapa'ai?"_

_With a horrified exclamation of "Chaapa'ai!" the monks fell flat on their faces in the middle of the road._

* * *

Sometime later, after a mortified Daniel tried to get the monks back on their feet, some muddled attempts at conversation and the requisite expression of disinterest in anything linguistic from Jack, they found themselves being escorted along that same road, towards what the monks had called "Chulak."

That he remembered. It was what had happened after they arrived that he was having trouble remembering now through the pounding in his skull.

"What happened?" he groaned softly, blinking at the dim light that was still too bright for his headache.

She sounded almost...amused as she answered, "You had some sort of allergic reaction to something--possibly the perfume Ra's new queen had drenched herself in. He apparently took your sneezing as a personal insult."

"Oh God." He looked around wildly for a moment for Jack, who was almost certainly spitting nails by now that Daniel's "geeky allergies" had gotten them into trouble.

Almost as if she'd read his thoughts, Carter answered them. "Colonel O'Neill and Skaara are looking for a way out of here."

That got his attention. "Skaara?"

She nodded.

 _Oh, thank God._ He'd hoped against hope that he would find him here, but a large part of him had whispered that it couldn't possibly be that easy. Maybe--just maybe--the Fates weren't really out to get him after all. Maybe just this once they'd decided to be merciful, that he'd suffered enough in the past few days...

Of course, that all depended on Jack and Skaara actually *finding* a way to get them out of here. Preferably before SG-2 left without them and General Hammond permanently locked out their identification code.

There was one thing, though..."It wasn't Ra. It was Apophis."

"Who?" Carter looked confused.

"Um... it's from Egyptian mythology. Ra was the sun god who ruled the day, Apophis was the serpent god, Ra's rival, who ruled the night. It's right out of the Book of the Dead. They're living it."

Before she could question further, he spotted his brother-in-law and the Colonel returning to them. His hope sank at the look on their faces.

"If there's a way out of here, I haven't found it yet," Jack confirmed his suspicion. "But look what I did find." He jerked a thumb over his shoulder at the Abydonian youth.

"Dani'el!" Skaara exclaimed as the archaeologist pulled him into a brotherly embrace. "O'Neill told me about Sha're. My father must be most grieved. She was very special to us."

Sha're. Another bolt of pain shot through him at the mention of his wife's name, pitching him back into the dark well of despair he'd only begun to contemplate crawling out of. "Yes...which is why I promised Sha're I would bring you home."

Skaara nodded solemnly in agreement. His buoyant spirit was subdued by the news of his sister's murder, but not wholly as his next words revealed: "But you--you are 'okay'!"

"Yeah, I think so," Daniel started with a sideways look at Jack, but then contradicted his words by sagging against the two soldiers.

"Easy, big guy." O'Neill helped him sit down, then sat beside him. "Welcome back to the land of the conscious."

"You're not mad?" Daniel asked warily.

"About what?"

"You know, the..." He mimed sneezing into an imaginary handkerchief.

"That? Come on, I'm not that petty!" the Colonel protested.

The other two members of his new team just looked at him.

"I'm not!" he insisted, then backed down a little when the skeptical looks never faded from their faces. "Well, I'm not *always* that petty!"

Daniel and Captain Carter just schooled their faces to look studiously innocent. "Yes, Sir."

"Look, if we can't find a way out of here, the mission's a bust anyway. They seal the Gate in just over ninety minutes." He looked over at Skaara. "C'mon, Skaara. There's bound to be some hidey-hole or something somewhere that we missed."

He stood only to find himself face to face with an unmasked serpent guard, a tall, dark-skinned man with Apophis' mark tattooed on his forehead in what appeared to be...gold. Both his head and face were completely smooth, as if he'd shaved only minutes ago.

"What is this?" the guard growled in a deep voice, seizing Jack's wrist at an awkward angle--despite an aggrieved "Ow!" from the man--and holding it so that they could see his words described the digital watch around the Colonel's wrist.

"It's a watch," Jack replied tightly, his face still contorted.

"This is not Goa'uld technology. Where are you from?" the guard then demanded.

"Earth. Chicago if you want to be specific--"

"Your words mean nothing," the taller man interrupted curtly. "Where are you from?" he repeated.

Knowing that nothing Jack could come up with would probably satisfy, Daniel spoke up. "Ah, excuse me..."

When the guard's attention was drawn to him, he bent down and drew the point-of-origin glyph for Earth in the dirt floor of the cell.

"This is where we're from."

The serpent guard stared at the symbol for a long moment, his expression unreadable, then rapidly scratched out the mark with the end of his staff weapon and turned away. The cobra-head helmet snapped closed, concealing his face and anything it might have revealed.

Exchanging a brief "what was that about?" look with both Daniel and Carter, O'Neill shrugged and he and Skaara went back to looking for a way out.


	3. Chapter 3

The last thing he was expecting was the light touch on his arm. Everyone else was busy, or so he'd thought. Jack was trying to explain to a very irate General Hammond why they'd brought a slew of refugees through the Gate with them, not to mention the very serpent guard who had led the initial attack on the base. The rest of the personnel were trying to figure out what to do with the refugees. All but one, anyway.

"Dr. Jackson, are you all right?" Captain Carter's concerned voice followed her hand, and he flinched from both. He tried not to look at the flash of hurt that passed through her eyes. It wasn't as if he'd asked for comfort, after all.

Still, it wouldn't be fair to take the anger he harbored towards himself out on her, so he forced his voice to sound less caustic than he felt: "No, actually, I'm not."

"If there's anything I can do to help..." she offered.

Her compassion was genuine. After a moment, so was the sad smile he offered in answer. "I know. Thanks."

"Daniel Jackson," a newly familiar, deep voice interrupted and Daniel stiffened. It was the serpent guard, Teal'c. The one who called himself a "Jaffa." The one who, according to Skaara--before he was taken to become a host--had kidnapped him from Abydos and given Sha're the staff wound that killed her. But at the same time, also the one who had saved all their lives barely an hour ago. The reason they were standing here now.

"May I speak with you?" he asked formally.

Carter looked from one to the other, warily. She said nothing, but her eyes offered Daniel her silent support. After a long, agonizing moment, he nodded. He'd heard Jack tell General Hammond that he wanted Teal'c to join SG-1. So, if the colonel had his way...even if he hated the Jaffa for the rest of his life, he would have to learn to live with him.

Returning the nod, the Captain quietly backed away. Close enough that she could still come to his aid if he got too upset, but far enough away to give the two some privacy.

"O'Neill tells me that the boy who was chosen is dear to you."

How exactly like Jack O'Neill to pass the buck for his own attachment to the kid, so he wouldn't have to admit how much it had hurt him to see conclusively that Skaara was no longer the boy they knew.

"He was my brother-in-law, yes," Daniel confessed tightly.

"Then the woman I fired upon in Ra's temple was your wife."

He didn't answer. Every part of him just hardened at the words--which amounted to a confession--his eyes, his face, and his body...even his heart. He felt almost as if he'd turned to stone.

"I have told General Hammond that I wish to make amends for what I have done in the service of Apophis. I hope by explaining my actions, I can begin to earn your acceptance, if not your forgiveness."

Forgiveness. He could have laughed. The man--or the Jaffa, rather--who had stolen everything from him, wanted his forgiveness.

"Fine. Explain." The words were forced through clenched teeth.

"From the moment I saw your wife, I knew Apophis would desire her. He sought a new host for his queen, Amaunet, and she possessed all the qualities of beauty and spirit that he would find admirable."

"That seems rather ironic," Daniel spat, "considering the host's 'spirit' appears to be crushed by the takeover."

"Indeed. Which is why the quality is so attractive to the Goa'uld--it gives them great pleasure to destroy it, just as it gives them pleasure to destroy the will of the people they enslave."

That silenced him. No wonder his reckless, foolish offer had been rejected--he'd had no spirit left to break.

"If your wife had been brought to Apophis' attention, as she surely would have been had I not wounded her before her passion caught his eye, I feel certain she would have also been taken, like her brother. It was, however misguided, intended as an act of mercy."

Mercy? He opened his mouth to object, but then an image of Skaara flashed into his mind. How Jack had run after him, only to be struck down with a cruel smile by the creature that now controlled the boy. How the glowing eyes had gleamed with pleasure at their deception, and the devastation in the eyes of a man who had once been like a second father.

Against his will, he saw Sha're like that--her eyes glowing, her face cold and cruel. Maybe even her hand lifting to throw him against the far wall of the banquet chamber, instead of Apophis'.

It was an image that made him suddenly sick to his stomach.

"I am sorry, Daniel Jackson," Teal'c stated quietly.

Daniel could only nod. Apparently, though, it was enough for the Jaffa, who quietly returned to where several MPs were waiting to take him to a holding cell.

Carter was back at his side almost the minute Teal'c left. "What did he want?"

He watched the stoic figure follow his escort out of the room before answering, "He wanted to apologize...for killing Sha're. He asked me to forgive him."

"Are you going to?"

A long silence followed as he pondered her question. Could he learn to forgive the Jaffa who had killed Sha're rather than let her share Skaara's fate, when he couldn't even forgive himself for letting it happen? "I don't know."

"It's okay." The Captain gave him a reassuring smile. "It takes time. If he really wants to set things right with you, he'll understand that." And if he doesn't, then maybe you're right not to trust him. She didn't say it, but she didn't need to--it was there in her eyes.

He nodded again, offering her another tentative smile, this time in gratitude. Gratitude for the long talk they'd shared the night Sha're died, for her unobtrusive, unconditional support and compassion in the time since that night, and most of all, for understanding why he couldn't yet accept the full gift of friendship that she'd offered him.

Seeming reassured that he would be all right, she walked away without another word.

He wasn't all right.

Despair hit him again as soon as she was gone, staring at the silent Stargate. Despair, and the bitter memory of Skaara's choosing. A choice that would never have been made if he hadn't wanted so badly to forget his loss...

* * *

__

"How much would I remember if you chose me?"

__

_The words came almost without him willing them too, just like the hand that had shot out to grab the robe of the "god" who was searching the crowd. It was a rash thing to do, utterly without logic, and he knew this. It was also suicide, but what did that matter if Sha're was already dead and the chances of him being able to keep even that last promise to her were dwindling by the second? Jack still hadn't found a way out, and now that the "gods" had come to choose...it seemed likely that he never would._

_If he had to live, wouldn't it be better to just forget? Forget that he had ever loved and lost; forget that he had failed her even in death..._

_"Daniel, what are you doing?" Jack hissed in his ear, incredulous._

_"Does anything of the host survive?" he demanded, almost in tears. "Or would I just...cease to exist...forget everything..."_

_He felt more than saw a movement out of the corner of his eye. One of the serpent guards had shifted almost imperceptibly, and glancing to the right revealed Jack's eyes firmly fixed on the guard's face._

_He didn't look to see what the Colonel was seeing. He didn't care._

_He just wanted the pain to end._

_"We choose..." the male "god" began._

_Daniel held his breath. Hell, the whole room seemed to be holding its breath._

_"Him." He pointed to Skaara._

_Skaara??_

_No! God, no...that wasn't what was supposed to happen..._

_The boy screamed as the guards lunged for him, grabbing him between them and pulling him away: "Na-ney! Na-ney! O'Neill! Dani'el!"_

_One of the voices shouting Skaara's name in return was easily identified as Jack's. The other, he barely recognized as his own. Hands like steel vices held them both back, forcibly denying the first instinct of his desperate panic--to run after his terrified brother-in-law and beg the "god" who had taken him to choose him instead..._

Oh, God, Sha're...what have I done?

* * *

"Daniel?" The voice was Jack's, the question surprisingly careful and unaccusing. Without turning, he knew that the military man was standing beside him now. And he felt that he was looking at him, not with the blame he expected for what he'd brought on the alien boy they both loved, but with the same concern Captain Carter had shown only moments ago.

"I failed," Daniel whispered. "It was the last thing she asked of me, and I failed her."

O'Neill just looked at him for a long moment, then shook his head. "No you didn't. Skaara's still out there."

Still out there...and still alive, even if only the loosest sense of the word.

"So what do we do?" the archaeologist asked helplessly.

Jack clapped a hand on his shoulder and smiled that sardonic, confident smile. "We find him."

He then looked back up at Major Kawalsky, who was still crouched on the ramp leading to the Gate, looking slightly dazed. "You gonna stay there all night, Kawalsky?"

Charlie slowly shook his head, the confused frown never leaving his face. "No Sir."

Seeming satisfied, O'Neill turned and walked away, the other two men following him.

**Author's Note:**

> Daniel's mini-treatise on arranged marriages in Part I is based on my own observations of a college friend who grew up in the Middle East, and who entered into an arranged marriage after graduation. I still remember her telling me about her engagement, and especially how she said the only difference was that she and Bassem decided to marry first, _then_ started dating and fell in love. And she was in love--you could see it in her face every time she talked about him. I can't help but believe something similar is what happened between Daniel and Sha're.
> 
> Resources:  
> http://www.sg1-scripts.de.vu/  
> http://www.gateworld.net/index.shtml  
> http://trickster.org/arduinna/stargate/


End file.
